To Posey

Dear Posey, my sweet little seven year old daughter,

A week or so ago we had a moment that is still in my mind. I had been STRONGLY ENCOURAGING you to get your skinny bootie into the shower so you could get to bed on time, and you had been resisting with all your might. We had one of those fierce stare downs that only mothers and daughters can appreciate, and just when I was starting to worry that you might win the doorbell rang and I dashed downstairs to pay for the pizza I had ordered for dinner (post stare down, obviously).

When you and Roan came downstairs to eat - Roan excitedly and you begrudgingly, Roan reported to me that "Posey said she hates you sometimes, Mom." Before I could even register a response, you burst into hysterical tears and threw your arms around my waist. Now, I've heard plenty of other mothers tell me that they were heartbroken or angry when their kids said they hated them, so I waited for a few seconds to see if I became furious or maudlin. And you know what? Nothing even close to that crossed my mind. I hugged you and attempted to peel you off of me, as you were not only gripping with all your force, but also seemed intent upon burying your nose in my belly button...and I did something that felt so simple and yet a little profound...I told you the truth. I said, "You know what? You probably do feel like you hate me sometimes - like when I make you clean your room, or take a shower, or tell you that no, you cannot lie naked on your bedroom floor and read magazines instead of putting away your laundry. And you want to know a secret? I said that about my mom when I was a kid, too. I never really meant it - I just said it when I was mad at her. So it's okay that you feel that way sometimes, as long as you know that I get on your case because I love you and want what is best for you." And you looked at me with those enormous blue eyes and even though you were still crying your face off, you gave me a teensy little smile that told me you understood.

Just as I was about to whip out my camera and set up the self-timer to capture the Supreme Parenting Moment on film, Roan piped up with, "Yeah, I get it. I haven't hated you since I was at least three, Mom. Now can we have some pizza?"

And life goes on.......